Note from Robby: This is an edited re-post of a previous post from my old blog location. This entry was originally published on Saturday, January 23, 2010

Over the last several months, I’ve grown more and more curious about what people have been through, or are going through. Here’s why…

For years, and I mean YEARS, I thought that if folks would just “Trust God” with their lives and marriages, then all this strife, and divorce, and infidelity, and selfishness, and all that jazz just didn’t necessarily have to be. I even thought that anyone who couldn’t overcome all that to “hold it together” (don’t you love that term?) was just not being Spiritual enough. Yes, I was one of those. We (my former wife and I) even taught a Sunday School class on marriage topics for several years to try and help stem the divorce tide – even within our own church. It was really successful, by typical “church” measures, because I made it fun, and we talked about all sorts of stuff (yeah, ALL of it – and in a Baptist church!).

Anyway, I’ve learned that I only did that to be in a place of acceptance by other people. And, I’ve ultimately learned that I spent most of our 23+ years of marriage basing my self-worth on what my wife thought of me. So, I NEVER was totally honest, or even truthful about far too many things… not with myself, or my wife… not if I thought it would mean disappointing her, or having her disapprove of me. Funny, I did some stupid things to break her trust, but it all resulted from me never TRUSTING her enough to be open and share truth with her.

So, while I am, or try to be, a Spiritual person (Christian, Baptist, believe in right and wrong, Jesus is the only way, all that kind of stuff), I ultimately also learned that the GREATEST gift God gave us was the Grace that goes with Salvation. And, if we are to “be of the same mind as Christ” as the Bible says, it is going to mean that we’ve got to give out a LOT of grace ourselves. Not that we can make ourselves into rag dolls, or punching bags, but we can learn to love for what can be, not withhold love for what has happened. In fact, I believe that even though my missteps cost me a marriage, there is still a purpose that God has for me, and He expects me to be about that purpose. You see, our purpose in Him is still the greatest calling we have. We clearly serve at least some of that purpose for our life by being a spouse, or a parent to our children, or in some ministry within our church. I serve it in using my specific talents and gifts in how I serve within my church (not to mention how those gifts fit with my job).

So, I can’t help but believe sometimes that God has intended to educate me on balancing LAW (living right just because it is right) and GRACE (understanding that I have the opportunity to live right today even if I messed up yesterday) so that I can help others see the value in BOTH.

So, why on earth did I write all that? NOT for some elaborate truth of Scripture. NO, the REAL reason:

I ache for what I see others going through…maybe even you, the reader, for whatever reason…so I want to offer you some encouragement. I know you want to have answers, or have this current challenge over with. I don’t know the details of that challenge, nor do I need to know. However, I hope even in this time, that you understand that you are still more than just your kids parent, or a spouse, or an employee. You are His  child (God’s if that’s not clear). He loves you, he knows you, and he knows all that is going on with you. Let me restate part of that…

He KNOWS YOU, and HE LOVES YOU! How HUGE is that?

So, if you need some encouragement beyond “convincing yourself” that you are OK, know it because He says it: You are OK.

Hear this phrase all over again as I did recently:

Jesus Loves Me, This I Know…for the BIBLE tells me so. Period.